You can give yourself more pain when you expect it
The Self-Fulfilling Prophesy is also known as the “Pygmalion Effect,” which goes in a circle that looks something like this:
- I have a belief about myself.
- That belief influences my actions towards others.
- This has an impact on the beliefs that others have about me.
- As a result, this impact causes others to behave in ways towards me that is consistent with my self-belief.
- When this happens, my belief is reinforced
- Or you believe you always get sick for 3 days.
- Your body believes what you believe and is sick for 3 days.
- This continues in an endless cycle.
In other words, I have a belief about myself and have an expectation that it will be fulfilled. Clearly, the self-fulfilling prophesy always involves yourself or two or more people. There is always what the self-believes and then convinces your body to react. Therefore, the mind-body connection is at work or there is another person or many other persons reacting to the self.
For example, a person could believe he was always going to be in pain. He believed in his pain and thus convinced everyone that he was in terrible pain. It is then that he embarked on an endless cycle of pain and made all the people around him miserable too. Yet when his doctor angered him by telling him he would never get better, he decided to prove everyone wrong and, in the process, proved to himself that he was going to get better. His pain ended.
Proving your Belief
Here is an example of how this works:
“Let’s say, for example, that I’m going to an event where I don’t know many people. If I believe I don’t make a good first impression, or I worry that nobody will talk to me, I will probably enter the event acting awkward, anxious, and standoffish. In turn, people are likely to interact with me with less enthusiasm, or they may ignore or shun me. This only reinforces my belief that I’m not good with people I don’t know.”
Here is another example of how our expectations influence the beliefs and behaviors of others:
“This self-fulfilling prophecy concept has been verified by many experiments and observations, and if we look at our own lives we can often see it happening in our lives in various situations. For example, parents who believe that their children will not do well in school tend to make it come true by reducing the emphasis on the importance of school work to their children and accepting poor grades from them. On the other hand, parents who believe their children can excel in school will create a home environment suitable for promoting reading and knowledge, emphasize the importance of school work and generally will not tolerate poor grade from their kids. All these will eventually propel their children to excel in school.”
Notice and change
Be careful of your own self-fulfilling prophecy.
Decide to let go of your belief. Exit the cycle.
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